Story We are Following...
Steve better know as "Gamer69" shocked party goers by showing up as a series of 1's and 0's for a Halloween party in Brooklyn. After winning best costume, Gamer69 revealed the matrix to a 2-set outside hoping it would display his knowledge of "relationships and social interactions".
"Women love sex" Gamer proclaimed to loud cheers from the crowd. "They just have something called ASD which prevents them from hoping on your bone and going for a ride."
A portly HB5 dressed as a bumblebee was taken aback by this insightful revelation and immediately began what Steve described as "the chemical process known as...attraction." He also told us this number close was "particularly F-ing solid" before emailing himself to a Lair Meeting downtown.
The fake RJ thinks up a clever comeback
A long winded debate on a community gossip blog turned bitter last night when a 12 year old kid pretending to be Thundercat went toe to toe with a 59 year old man pretending to be Ross Jeffries.
"That was some wild ass shit" said a long time poster who pretends to be Tyler Durden.
The foul mouthed tween posing as Thundercat started the fight by accusing RJ of using hypno-marketing to seduce men into buying his products.
Seeing a golden opportunity to fight back, a bored naked man took on the role of Ross Jeffries and called who he thought was the 'real' Thundercat a "mother fucking AFC bitch ass punk"
The debate raged violently for several weeks until a truce was brokered by a twice divorced tax accountant named Peter, one of several guys who pretend to be Style.
Some readers of Thundercats blog have complained they feel "duped" by the news of rampant impostor posting.
"So you're saying the Mystery who promised to come to my 17th birthday party isn't the real guy from Vh1?" whined a wbAFC who now has to break the news to disappointed friends
The Daily Sarge was unable to get an official comment from the "real" Thundercat so we just made some shit up, forged his signature and called it a day.
Tolle mentally prepares to kick your ass
New York, NY
Ekhart Tolle, good friend of Oprah and author of the best selling book "The Power of Now" was shocked to learn yesterday that his books are being used by PUA's to score "hot" chicks and pull "serious" ass.
"My painbody was pretty fucking pissed-off to be honest with you" Tolle barked at several reporters inside the VIP lounge at Club Myst.
As he tried to relax passerbys showered the guru with what are known as mega-props .
"I'm pulling mad pussy yo!" shouted a short man in a Dr. Seuss hat.When asked what he planned to do Tolle gave us his trademark wisdom wrapped in an ancient haiku riddle
"I came here tonight to do two things" Tolle quipped while suppressing his Ego in favor of his more muscular Id
"Kick some ass and drink some beer...
looks like we're almost out of beer"
- Daily Sarge
mASF egg-heads practicing their seductive poses
Los Angeles, CA
In an attempt to get back the glory days of the community when members were smart, mASF has launched it's exclusive egg-heads board.
Members were hand picked based on median IQ and 11th grade PSAT scores.
Invitations were sent via email late last night.
"If you didn't receive one it's safe to say you're pretty dumb" stated Formahandle via a press release.
The egg-heads board is off to a fast start with members discussing advanced meta-frame reframing and quantum shit test betaization-calibration in mLTR 's.
For those left out, an exclusive board for seduction geniuses seems a bit unfair.
"What the fuck is an egg-head?" grumbled one uninvited AFC who obviously failed lots of classes in Junior High.
"Sounds like some humpty dumpty shit yo" .
- Daily Sarge